anyone heard of a moissanite engagement ring?
Q.Moissanite is a stone that has recently been discovered. 9 out of 10 jewelers cannot tell the difference between a moissanite and a diamond, AND it is almost as hard as a diamond. Since I am very low on cash, I am thinking of buying an engagement ring with one 3/4carat moissanite with 2 small .20 carat diamonds on the side. Of course, after I give her the ring, I will explain that since she wants a big wedding I had to cut corners on the ring, but I will replace it with a diamond when we can afford to... Has anyone done this? Is this too tacky? (I am only trying to keep us from having a huge debt, since the wedding is costing me - us - so much...) And she knows I am having to borrow the money for everything...
A.You seem to have misunderstood, or perhaps I didn't explain well. I do not RESENT having to pay for the wedding or the ring, it's just an economic reality that I cannot afford both, and like one person said, since the wedding is something that cannot be re-done, and the ring is, I think it makes more sense to buy a cheaper ring in order to have the wedding she wants. IF she feels the moissanite is ugly, or doesn't "feel right" about having a synthetic diamond, I will replace it; I'll buy it with a 30-day return guarantee. I understand that many women are very emotional about weddings and rings, my fiancee included. Some say, "If it's fake, I don't want it". But if one cannot tell the difference without a jeweler's loop, what difference does it make? Is it a beautiful ring? To me, that is all that "should" matter. Lyn says that moissanites are "way fake". I haven't yet seen one. If that is the case - that it does not look like a diamond to the average person, or to me (I've been looking at diamonds and know what they look like!), then I won't even buy it. However, if it looks just like a diamond, then I think it is a reasonable way of putting more money towards the wedding without having another grand or two of debt. But it seems to me, the bottom line is, "Is it a beautiful ring?" If it quacks like a duck, and looks like a duck, then it's probably a duck! (or a damned good imitation!) Well, in general, no, I wouldn't tell either. But I would hope that in an engagement/wedding situation that first of all, you both realize that this is something that you'll wear every day for the rest of your life and you want something that suits your tastes and style. Second of all, I'd hope that you'd be able to express that it's not to your taste without being offensive about it (e.g.: "Honey, it's a lovely ring, but it's not quite my style" as opposed to "This ring sucks - couldn't you pick out something nicer"). Finally, I'd hope that the giver would be understanding that the desire for a different ring is not a rejection of the proposal or the person. On the other hand, this is a bad expectation to have. It's a short slide from this to "if you really loved me, you'd know what I like w/out my having to tell you". Not a good basis for a sound relationship. A level of expectation that a man wouldn't buy his quiet, subdued fiance a gaudy ring is fine. But then again, some guys just don't get it. I know my husband was pretty clueless about what I really liked until I actually showed him what I liked - but then again I don't wear much jewelry on a regular basis, so he had nothing to judge by.
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